The Royal Wedding Vows... or at least, how they SHOULD have been.

Do you, William of Wales, take Kate Middleton to be your lawfully wedded wife in sickness, health and various tabloid scandals? To hold and cherish whilst flying the flag for an outdated and archaic monarchy which continues to leech off British taxpayers while in return delivering such balanced and well-meaning human specimens such as Prince Phillip and Prince Harry? Do you agree to love, honour and obey each other, as well as to allow your media circus titled "The Royal Wedding" to dominate all major news coverage, as it is clearly more important than what's happening in Libya, Syria and Christmas Island? Do you promise to smile, wave and titter about at every waking moment for the benefit of women's magazines, without which millions of intellectually-starved housewives would simultaneously cancel their subscriptions to Woman's Day and That's Life and thus be forced to have nothing to read in various medical waiting rooms? Finally, do you agree to specifically censor The Chaser whilst letting everyone else and their dog cover the royal event? If so... congratu-fucking-lations.

Welcome!

Welcome to News for Creative Lunatics! If you're after a view of today's news, current affairs and other topical morsels that aren't constrained by strange concepts such as "serious", "boring", "realism", "verified", "newsworthy" and "Fox News", then you've come to the right place. It's a little difficult to describe what will be posted here, but the best I can say now is that it will attempt to be a satirical take on news and other current events, without letting the real world facts get in the way of good news. To get things rolling, I'll post something that I put up a few months earlier, partly to give an idea of what one can expect, and partly because writing it up convinced me to start this blog. So thanks for sticking around long enough to read this intro, tell all your friends about it, and I hope you get a kick out of it!

P.S. For those of you who mistakenly came here looking for News for Conservative Lunatics, you're in the wrong place, but here's the right link for you. Click on it, and never come back please:

www.dailytelegraph.com.au

Cheers!